“How to stop screwing yourself over | Mel Robbins | TEDxSF” on YouTube

Mel Robbins is a neat petson. She’s one of my favorite speakers. You know how I love a good lecture!

I want to say first, it’s good to help others… in fact it’s one of the best things you can do to make yourself a good human.

The problem lies when you help others at the expense of your own happiness and well being. You have to be fullfilled yourself before you can help fulfill others. Why? Because if you’re struggling yourself, barely getting by in life, then you’ll surely come to resent the person you are helping or giving to.

You must give from a full heart or suffer the consequences. It’s been said so much that it’s almost cliche.. But if you have ever flown then you’re probably familiar with the safety announcements before takeoff. If not, I’ll remind you of the part that’s related to my point.

“In the event of lost cabin pressure, oxygen masks will deploy from overhead…. be sure to put YOUR  oxygen mask on first before helping others”  I did that from memory so it’s not verbatim what the attendants say.. but you get the point.

It’s true though. It’s also similar to talking to a homeless person about any kind of higher being.. whether that being is Jesus, Muhammed or even ( from a Universalist perspective) the law of attraction or higher self. People who have problems meeting their basic needs can’t be up that high ( self actualization) on Maslow’s hierarchy.

So my point is; take every opportunity to be kind… it doesn’t cost anything. Besides, with every positive thought and good deed, you are doing your part in tipping the planet into a state of positivity.. a state of peace…. a state of bliss.. True happiness can not live under a blanket of negativity.. I’m NOT saying you let people walk all over you.. that’s not good either. What I’m saying is please think twice before taking your limited resources (mental, physical and financial) to help someone who may or may not appreciate it. It’s not always about the money… in fact it’s more about the people who take more from your life more than they are giving.

Don’t allow the people in your life to be out of balance. If you find someone who is, cut your losses, close the account and open one with someone who will appreciate you for you….Like Beyonce said “flaws and all” True and healthy love is unconditional love. It’s not based on what you look like, how much money you have, your political pursuasion or even how popular you are. You deserve to be loved for who you are at the present.. whether you plan on staying there or not. You don’t have to prove your worth to anyone. Your only job is to be the best person you possibly can be and spread as much love around as humanly possible.. You deserve nothing less.

So with that being said… here is Mel Robbins. If you can, watch it on your TV using Chromecast or Roku.